hi mom dad and family. I sure missed you all this week. I can imagine that is was a rough week for everyone, but I am glad everyone was able to be together. thanks mom and dad for your emails last week. dad I sent you a letter in the mail and had sent mom one the week before, so you should be getting those soon. dad, I took the time to write to you what I was feeling, and what I wanted you to know. i hope you get it soon. it was really hard at first to do what you said and to think about others like Christ would do. All I wanted to do was read my letters from you and mom over and over again in an attempt to feel close to you. But I realized that just opened the wound again and again. I knew I shouldn't keep reading the letter, but all I wanted was to feel close to you. So on wednesday hna jones, hna arnell, and I sat for about 15 minutes at 2pm here, and for a moment I thought and prayed as I remembered uncle doug and thought of you all. (This was our special time we planned to be with Whitney. Stop everything at 2pm and think about one another, our family, Uncle Doug and the atonement. We were in the pre-funeral viewing for Whitney's, dad's twin brother Doug.) after, I prayed, and then we went to work. I know that only through the help of heavenly Father was I able to forget what I wanted and focus on what God wants, which is what I'm teaching others, what they so desperately need to know too, that through the restored gospel of Jesus Christ, we can prepare ourselves to be together as families for eternity. that knowledge doesn't bring someone back to life and doesn't fill the hole that now exists where, for example, uncle doug had filled, but it calms the pain and makes it much more bearable. hna arnell gave me a talk by elder holland called, lessons from liberty jail. I recommend it. he talks about how without the atonement, all of our trials, that in our eyes are sometimes so unbearable, would be so much worse if He had never suffered to be able to succor us. this morning i was reading in Mark the chapter of the crucifiction of Christ. it brings tears to my eyes what He so willingly did for us. the atonement is the center of everything, and it is so true that the more one learns about the Atonement, the more he or she is able to find joy in life and have the desire to follow Him, because the Spirit touches something inside of us and changes us.
on another note, who is hna arnell you might be thinking? she is our new companion. we are a trio. another blessing form the Lord to give me support right now. she is great. from riverton, utah, has 4 and a half months in Paraguay, and came from Coronel Oviedo. it has been fun asking her how everyone is doing there. we are all really excited. it takes adjusting, and it is kind or weird at first, but so much fun. she is also 6 feet tall and towers over me.
we are teaching some really great people. I love them so much. N is going through such a rough time, doesn't have a job, then this week her cell phone and her refrigerator broke, which put her super anxious and stressed, but she always reads in her Book of Mormon. she was super stressed about everything, so didn't feel up to going to church, but please pray for her that she will come next week and that she can start to feel her faith grow. she is so special to us. well, I am already out of time. I love you all so so much. oh and mom, I think the valentines package came, because I am going to get one today, but the other is still on the way. thanks so much.